Day 13

We are heading to Atlanta. Judy and I will stay in Atlanta tonight so we can catch our morning nonstop flight to Puerto Vallarta. The flight departs at 9:45am. Please be in prayer. Might want to make it extra as this time I won’t be taking and drugs before take off!

Well since I began this I can’t hold anything back. I continued my spree again late last night. Pizza once again defeated me. Then this morning that little white glove woke me up and I just had to eat some Hamburger Helper. I took the time to sit on him so maybe he won’t be rearing his ugly head again. (For now!)

So all this means I am back to 300 land. Weighing in just a few minutes ago at 301.4. L So now my total weight loss on the 2 week preop liquid diet is 12.6. Now the 2 weeks isn’t up until Tuesday so we will hope to get that back to at least 15 and hopefully more. (The ticker won’t update when you go backwards)(I kind of like that!)

The seriousness of this is hoping that my liver still has shrunk to help the surgery go smooth. I should not have cheated and even when I did it should have been with lean meat.

But the truth is Friday night I basically cracked. What I didn’t tell you yesterday was I had actually called off the surgery. I had been held up in this house and for 12 days when through intense withdrawals and hunger pains. I was very proud of myself as I did not cheat even one time. To be honest just about everyone I talked to said they cheated and were impressed I had not.

The truth is had not eaten I most likely would not be heading for the surgery. So much time with no food has a way of messing with your mind. I began to believe this was what my life was being reduced to. The excitement of a new life faded away and I simply couldn’t see past the current situation I was in.

So while I messed up I also believe though that I am still on track because in 48 hours I will be “sleeved”! And that new life will have begun.

So everything in recent days is just a reminder that I have a problem and that surgery is going to give me another tool to help me in this battle to say "Farwell to Fat”.